write it down: Ever thine. Ever mine. Ever ours.

Tonight I'm going to write about the random thoughts in my head.

Christopher,

One more night alone. One more, that's it. Thank god.

I honestly don't have much to write about tonight because the only thing going on in my head is the fact that I'll be reunited with you tomorrow.

It is a bit sad, though, that this is my last letter to you. I mean, realistically, I could continue to write you letters every day even if you're here with me, but it won't be the same. I guess this homecoming is bittersweet in a way. Much more sweet than it is bitter, trust me, but still.

I am pretty pleased with the time we had apart, honestly. I think we really needed it in order to heal and move on. I think we now have the chance to start over and fresh and begin anew. Soon we'll have other fresh starts as well, such as a new apartment, a new car (for you), and a new semester. I really want this to be different, Chris, and I really think we have the ability to make it so. I want things to feel like they used to with us. I already can feel it starting just after the two hour visit we had yesterday. I have faith in us. I have faith in you. I'm very excited for this new chapter in our lives together.

I'm very proud of you, baby. You're inspiring and strong and determined and caring and brave. You've done so well this week and you're going to continue to do well and get better. I can't wait to watch you do it and I will be here with you every single step of the way. I love you more than words could ever describe. You are my moon and my sun, my day and my night, my heart and my soul. You're everything to me.

Before I sleep, I'd like to share this poem with you written by Ludwig van Beethoven. I came across it yesterday and knew I had to share it with you because it so beautifully describes so much of what I feel for you. Here you go:

Though still in bed, my thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved, now and then joyfully, then sadly, waiting to learn whether or not fate will hear us - I can live only wholly with you or not at all - Yes, I am resolved to wander so long away from you until I can fly to your arms and say that I am really at home with you, and can send my soul enwrapped in you into the land of spirits - Yes, unhappily it must be so - You will be the more contained since you know my fidelity to you. No one else can ever possess my heart - never - never - Oh God, why must one be parted from one whom one so loves. And yet my life in Vienna is now a wretched life - Your love makes me at once the happiest and the unhappiest of men - At my age I need a steady, quiet life - can that be so in our connection? My angel, I have just been told that the mailcoach goes every day - therefore I must close at once so that you may receive the letter at once - Be calm, only by a clam consideration of our existence can we achieve our purpose to live together - Be calm - love me - today - yesterday - what tearful longings for you - you - you - my life - my all - farewell. Oh continue to love me - never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.

Ever thine.
Ever mine.
Ever ours.

The end of this poem is one of my favorite lines in history. "Ever thine. Ever mine. Ever ours." Meaning my heart will always belong to you, your heart will always belong to me, and no matter how far apart we may be, our hearts will always belong to each other. We will always be together no matter the distance. What a perfect poem to find during this time. What a perfect three sentences to tell you what you mean to me.

I have some very cute Dukelights to finish off the week. Duke got to spend some time with his buddies today, and then he was very tired all night. The pictures say it all...